Infighting

It was a slow night. I had two tables that stayed for over two hours. At one table was a couple of women sharing fries and two bottles of wine. The table next to them was a couple on a date. The two women were obviously buzzed when they asked for the check. Upon receiving it the one with longer hair informed me that they shouldn't be charged tax. According to her NY doesn't tax alcohol. She also informed me that she would know since she is a lawyer. The tax was less than $6. The bill was $76 total. I sent the manager over. I don't get paid enough to deal with crap like this. She spends five minutes arguing with him, he finally succumbs and takes the tax off of the check. I go into the kitchen for two minutes, when I return there is inter-table arguing. It's very loud. The couple is amazed that the two women refused to pay the $6 tax. The two women are amazed that the couple is saying anything to them at all. J came over and asked the tables to shut up, politely of course. Finally after a few minutes the two women pay and leave.

Once the drama ended the night was almost over. It never ceases to amaze me how many tables want to get out of paying the entire bill.

I need a vacation.

The Five Most Annoying Things a Customer Can Do

1. If you need more time to decide what to order I have no problem with that but please communicate this when I ask if you are ready. Please don't tell me you are ready to order and then proceed to look over the menu as if for the first time while saying presumably to yourself hmmm... should I get the salad... while leaving me standing there waiting as if I have nothing else to do.

2. This happens at least twice a night. I go to clear a plate and the patron says enthusiastically, I really didn't like it while smiling as I look down on the empty plate. Yes, I get the joke. It's not funny and it's definitely not original. Please stop.

3. What's good here? What do I want? What do you like? Is that enough food? I hate these questions. I understand if you are looking for something specific and need menu guidance. I understand if you need a description of a dish or type of wine. I get a lot of customers however who need hand holding through the ordering process.

a.What's good here? I will go through the menu and tell you what is popular, how things are prepared, what ingredients are used, that sort of thing. I may even give you a personal opinion once I've gauged what you're looking for.

b.What do I want? I am not a mind reader. If I were I would not be working here. I'd be using my awesome skills for world domination.

c.What do you like? Usually when I tell customers what I like, for example the Shiraz is excellent, I get a response like, oh, I hate Shiraz. Well good for you.

d.Is that enough food? Umm... how do I know what your appetite is like?

4. How is everything? Silence. Would you like another drink? Silence. I know that service staff sometimes have to interrupt customers deep conversations but do you have to completely ignore us when we're asking how your food is?

5. You are out to dinner with friends. Your meal is complete, the restaurant is starting to fill up around you, you get the check and then you continue to sit there for forty five minutes. I understand that you are enjoying the atmosphere but please don't be oblivious to your surroundings. The server is losing money by having you continue to sit at the table. Having dinner doesn't mean you are renting the table for the entire night.

Valentine's Day Massacre

What a difference a year makes. Maybe it's the crappy economy or lack of romantic decorations... we did have some couples. And some single chicks out for a celebratory dinner. And there were the older lesbians that for some reason decided to tell younger lesbians at a separate table that they "like what they see". I convinced S who I was working with to also wear a flower in her hair. I read some study that stated that waitress who wear flowers in their hair get better tips. Maybe the study was done in Hawaii. In any event the tips were OK, and the cute happy couples not too nauseating. I do wish it was busier though. Of course I always wish that.

The night ended with me and S dancing our asses off at a bar for J's bday. Nothing makes you forget a crappy night at work quicker than vodka and 80s dance music.

New Years Eve

OK, I realize I haven't posted in ages. It's been a crazy busy year. I bartended at a private party in a huge art gallery on NYE. It was for a young Buddhist organization. Before the doors were offically opened the organizers walked around the space holding candles and chanting. I imagine this was to bless the space, although I'm not a hundred percent on that. They were very nice and the party was a success. By success I mean that everyone behaved themselves and I managed to walk with a large sum of money. Toward the end of the night I did have a few conversations with some very inebriated customers. One gentleman was particularly concerned with my having a good time. When I tried to explain that I was there to work and didn't need to have a drink or ten, he took it upon himself to pour me a glass of champagne. Which I graciously took two sips of and toasted him with.

It was a pretty good night overall. Hopefully it's not all downhill from there.